Fun/Humor

Its Nearly Business Time

In a few hours, I will be on my way to Saint Pauls Journey into Philosophy up in Vancouver with a friend of mine. I may type of up a response so those who didn’t get to make it will be both jealous and informed. However, in the mean time, I have two little jewels for the reader.

1. From Wired:

Website Lets You Send a Post-Rapture E-Mail to Friends ‘Left Behind’

For just $40 a year, believers can arrange for up to 62 people to get a final message exactly six days after the Rapture, that day when — according to Christian end times dogma — Christians will be swept up to heaven, while doubters are left behind to suffer seven years of Tribulation under a global government headed by the Antichrist.

“You’ve Been Left Behind gives you one last opportunity to reach your lost family and friends for Christ,” reads the website, which is purportedly run “by Christians, for Christians.” The domain name is registered through an anonymous proxy service, presumably to protect the proprietors from the Forces of Darkness, and not because they’re up to anything shady.

The e-mails will be triggered when three of the site’s five Christian staffers “scattered around the U.S.” fail to log in for six days in a row — a system that incorporates a nice margin of safety, should two of the proprietors turn out to be unrepentant sinners or atheists.

Users can also upload up to 150 megabytes of documents, which will be protected by an unidentified encryption algorithm until the Rapture, then released to up to 12 nonbelievers of your choice. The site recommends that you use that storage to house sensitive financial information.

“In the encrypted portion of your account you can give them access to your banking, brokerage, hidden valuables, and powers of attorneys,” the site says. “There won’t be any bodies, so probate court will take seven years to clear your assets to your next of kin. Seven years, of course, is all the time that will be left. So, basically the Government of the Antichrist gets your stuff, unless you make it available in another way.”

Of course, some of us would sooner trust the Antichrist with our stuff than turn it over to a company that hides behind an anonymous domain registration service, and doesn’t list a single corporate officer or employee by name on its website.

The company, You’ve Been Left Behind LLC, didn’t respond to an e-mail query, raising the obvious question of whether the Rapture has already begun.

2. And, because its Wednesday, it is business time:

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3 thoughts on “Its Nearly Business Time

  1. I actually had an opportunity to correspond via email with one of the proprietors of the rapture site. It is deeply flawed from the standpoint of security (and I will let you make your own call on theology), but he seemed genuinely interested in addressing everyone’s concerns. I personally do not think these guys are scammers.

  2. William, I get why they do this. In fact, I remember my own fervent prayers years ago that prayed for salvation of family members before God would rapture Christians (or delay the rapture). And to have the ability, within the dispensational construct, to allow for loved ones to see what some think the truth to be and give warning, seems loving. However, despite sincerity, which is quite honest, its hard for me to take the actual theology, and indeed the entire subculture, seriously anymore. But thanks for the links.

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